Dear Messrs Venal and Grabbit,Should your fine advertisment not also read 'yours AND ours?)'?Just a thought,Very Kind Regards,Bartholomew Curmudgeonly, Articled Clerk, Tightwad and Curmudgeonly LLP Solicitors and Commissioners for ( non swearing) oaths.( Ps: my father told me to comment on your fine post in the fullest expectation that, upon completion of my traineeship, you would give me a job)
Dear Bartholomew,You make an excellent point. Clearly, you are just our sort of person - we confirm that we will bear you in mind should a suitable vacancy arise. You are prepared to work 24/7/365 for the minimum wage?Yours etc.,Venal & Grabbit.
Dear Messrs Venal and Grabbit,Whilst I would be prepared to work for your fine organisation in exchange for the minimum wage given that I am already kept by my family, there will unfortunately be those occasions when I simply will not be able to work - the ENTIRE Polo Season/Glyndebourne/Wimbledon/Ascot notwithstanding - and I am sure that, as men of the world, you would understand this.Sincerely,Bartholomew Curmudgeonly.
Dear Bartholomew,Oh dear. Unfortunately, we do not allow our assistants to take time off. Perhaps you are not V & G material after all.Yours etc.,Venal & Grabbit.
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