Venal & Grabbit announce salary bands for associates

Venal & Grabbit ('V & G') have confirmed its associate pay bands for 2011.

Pay for newly-qualified lawyers remains at the national minimum wage, while pay for those with one year's post-qualification experience will be 'a bit more, possibly'.

All other associates will be remunerated in accordance with the normal pay bands, with progression being determined by such factors as obsequiousness, who is last out of the office each evening and, of course, fee income.

Trainees will continue to be expected to pay for the privilege of working at V & G.

Senior Partner Edgar Venal said: "I have heard that some firms pay ridiculous salaries to their associates. Someone even told me that one firm pays over £60,000 to its newly-qualified lawyers, although I'm sure that was a joke. Here at Venal & Grabbit we think our associates should be grateful they get paid at all."