I have received the following press release from Messrs. Venal & Grabbit, Solicitors:


London, 10th August 2011: Venal & Grabbit wish it to be known that they are appalled at the news that Scottish firm Burness is awarding all staff members a 10 per cent bonus, after posting rises in turnover and profits for the 2010-11 financial year.

Senior Partner Edgar Venal said: "This is setting a terrible example for the profession. Employed staff should be grateful they have work at all, and should not be encouraged to expect to be rewarded simply because profits are up. Profits are required to maintain the lifestyle of partners.

"The next thing you know, staff will be demanding more than the minimum wage. Where would that leave us?"